There’s an electricity that courses through a man before he’s put to the test. It’s the look of a sprinter waiting for the starting gun, a warrior before his final stand, a skydiver ready to leap at 30,000 feet. Intensely focused, it represents a lifetime of preparation converging on a single moment. Of all the places I’d expect to see that look, a cleaning convention at London’s ExCeL Centre was not it. Yet from a far corner of The Cleaning Show 2023 conference hall, I could see Terry ‘Turbo’

“So what are you doing for Valentine’s day?” Don’t worry, you don’t have to answer that. I just wanted to make sure you’re feeling the same pang of dread as me, because that’s what that question does, doesn’t it? It tethers a big ball of shame and self-loathing to our ankles whether we’re single or not. It’s sad. What was once a quirky annual milestone honouring an almost 1800-year-old saint has become a monolith. Valentine’s day is now a blinding, pink sun that explodes into life this time eve